The tears have been a flowin'!!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008 |

Oh my goodness! I have been without Internet/phone service for the last 36 hours!!! Our provider was experiencing "technical difficulties". Oh brother.....How did I ever survive without a computer? SERIOUSLY??
I was just SURE that I had missed the most important email that had EVER been sent to me, or maybe I had won some GREAT giveaway and only had a few hours to respond, OR what if my blog had suddenly shut down and y'all were in hysterics trying to email and call and email and call...........OH MY, the HORRIBLE possibilities of what could have been are TERRIBLE just terrible.

Ummmm........NONE of that happened.......I received a few emails from an 'Amazing' business opportunity guaranteeing me to make three thousand dollars the second I signed up, and I didn't win any giveaways, so MAYBE just MAYBE I overreacted a teeny weeny little bit. (but I still shudder at the chaos that COULD HAVE ensued......)

So, glad to rejoin you in cyber/blog world after an excruciating 36 long hours! I'm sure you are DYING to get caught up with my life, so here ya go.
I'M AN ABSOLUTE CRYING EMOTIONAL BASKET CASE!!! Today Craig and I went to one last meet and greet at Ava's new preschool. I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE her teacher, but that doesn't change the fact that my BABY is going to school. She of course is over the moon excited, and has her clothes and shoes for the morning set out and right next to her in her room. I on the other hand am trying to find a legitimate excuse as to WHY she doesn't really need to start school in the morning. (if she so much as SNEEZES in the morning, she's NOT going. Excuse me a minute while I go pwder her room with pepper)

Up to this point I have spent all my days with Ava. Just me and her while Carter is at school. She has not been involved in any other programs other than ballet. And I have LOVED every last minute of our time together. I have TRULY dreaded this day ever since the day I signed her up for preschool last February.
I seriously have not been able to talk about this today to anyone without crying! (as the tears flow now while I type)
I was with my friend Robin today, TRYING to tell her about the school, and little Drew says " Mommy, why in tha wooold is Miss Heidi cryin'?" (he's a total CHARACTER!!.....and he has been the ONLY one that has suceeded in making me laugh today!)
To say that I dread the morning, is putting it mildly.
I know it's just preschool, but to me it's the end of having a baby at home with me. (when Carter went to preschool, I had Ava at home) Sooooooooooooo, I guess I'll just have to have another baby!!??-0)
Ha! on that note......I covet your prayers for Ava in the morning, and to be frank, FOR ME!! I'm sure I will have a report tomorrow evening! Have a great night, and LOVE on your sweet gifts from heaven today! I know I THANK GOD for my precious angels everyday!!

ps. I also decided for some dumb reason today that I would read the very emotional interview in People magazine this week with Steven Curtis Chapman's family about their tragic loss, and OF COURSE I bawled like a little baby. It is an AWESOME article though, and God's amazing LOVE and GRACE is portrayed beautifully with this family. You should read it if you get a chance.

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  • Scrapper Mom

    Heidi, I distinctly remember the day Little Ann started Kindergarten. There are 8 years between my kids and while my oldest was in school doing his own thing, the little one and I would take our trips into the library for story time, to eat at our little Mexican rest. (she called the cheese dip place) and then gymnastics. I missed it so much when she went to school and left me home alone. I cried the whole day. I know that didn't make you feel any better. But I can sympathize with you for sure.

  • ShortOne

    i too remember the day, mine started. although,i worked, it had been at a preschool and of course she was there in the same building. no one understand how i could be so upset when she had always been in daycare. i made it to my car after dropping her off & then cried my eyes out all the way across town to work & watched the clock constantly. she had a great day & then we settled in to our new routine. i tell you all this to say - it is ok to be an emotional basket case!!! i wish you all the luck in the world and please know that I will be praying for you both to have a great day and to make it through! love & hugs to you!!!!

  • alliekat

    Kindergarten/preschool/high school is never easy to send your babies to. Somehow we get through it and they get through it and we learn to appreciate each other so much more.

    The Steven Curtis Chapman interview is awesome. What a great testimony the entire family has. I loved it. It was a HUGE tear jerker.

  • David, Tammy, Megan and Hobbes

    See, I keep telling you and Ivette to come over to the "dark side" and homeschool your kids and then you won't miss them! ha! ha! :-) (I crack myself up...)

    I hope you both have a godo day tomorow.

    AND I think having another baby is a SWELL idea!

  • Janis

    I hope all goes well today. I am not looking forward to that day at all and it's still 3 years away! :)

    I can relate to your feelings of being without internet. I would go crazy!! Perhaps it shows me that I am too addicted...if there is such a thing! :)

    Have a great day


  • BethAnne

    Therefore, there is now no condemnation for mama's who cry when their babies go to school.

    When Lake went to kindergarten I cried in the room, I cried to the teacher, I cried so hard I couldnt fill out any paperwork, then I went and sat in my car outside his classroom and cried for about 30 minutes, then I met my husband and other son at a Mexican restaraunt and cried the whole time I was there............

    It stinks that kids have to grow up!!! I am with you and I say CRY all you want sister! Nothing wrong with that.........I get so mad when I hear moms say that they cant wait for their kids to go to school or go back to school after a break......If it were up to me, my kids would stay with me forever, but then they would be completely weird and socially unacceptable, so I have decided that I have to let them go out into the world to become functioning members of society (translate: my husband said there is no way I am keeping my kids home all the time and making them weird)

  • Danielle (Life with the Hewitt Family)

    I am glad that you are back!

    Sorry to hear about your hard time with Ava going to Preschool. I have already been getting sad about the day when Carter goes off to school, and that is 2 years away! It is a mix of emotions for moms when our little babies take a new step in their life. Just think of all the extra time you will have to do things YOU want to do...I think you should treat yourself to a massage or a pedicure!

    I hope Ava has a great first day of Preschool!

  • gina

    Sending prayers and love your way...please return the favor next week. :)