Apparently my children need a GEOGRAPHY lesson....or two.......

5:05 am: Carter, Ava, and myself leave our house.
5:45 am: Pick up mom and WE ARE OFFICIALLY ON OUR WAY!
6:00 am: me: "mom, are you sure we're going the right way?"
mom: "I think........I don't know........oh, no............what if we are already going the wrong way?"
6:25 am: Ava: "are we there yet?"
Carter: "just tell me when we get to FLORIDA"
7:00 am: Carter: "are we still in Tennessee?"
me: "we just got into Tennessee, we will be here a while"
Ava: "what's a farm?"
Later in the morning........ mom: "kids! look at the water we're crossing, it's the Kentucky......"
Carter: "OCEAN!"
mom: "river."
Ava: "how long is this trip anyways?"
me: "don't ask again"
a little later: Carter: "are we out of TEXAS yet?"
me: "yep"
9:30ish am: Ava: "are we on the farm yet?"
me: " I said don't ask again"
Carter: " you said don't ask 'are we there yet', Ava asked if we are on the farm yet"
me: " get smart one more time, and you're gonna get it"
11:00 am: Carter: "Nene, what country are we in?"
1:30ish pm: Carter: "Nene, now that mommy is asleep, are we almost there?"
mom: "ok, we're going to learn a song......repeat after me, "we're going to be driving ALL day and MOST of the night" ........all together now, "we're going to be driving ALL........"
a while later: we drive by a VERY large cross along the side of the road....
Carter: "Nene, is that the cross that Jesus died on?"
Ava: "Nene, can you drive.......or not?"
2:00pm: we arrive at a rest stop.
Carter: "where are we?"
Ava: "I think it's the farm"
2:10pm: we are leaving rest stop
mom: "Carter, where are we going again?"
Carter: "umm, AAARL....ando?"
3:30ish pm: Carter: "when are we going to get to the water?"
me: "if y'all don't stop asking "when are", I am going OUTLAW ALL questions!.....and we're not going ANYWHERE NEAR the water...so STOP asking!"
Carter: "well, when are we going to eat?"
me: "that's it, all questions are outlawed from now on!"
sometime later: me: "Carter, did you just say stupid to Ava?"
Carter: "no."
me: " I heard you, you better tell the truth right now, or I'm stopping the car......do you KNOW what happens to liars when they grow up?"
Carter: "what?"
me: "they go to JAIL, that's what!"
(meanwhile Ava has her mp3 player on and has the music louder than a rock concert, and is COMPLETELY oblivious to what is going on....)
all of a sudden Ava: "WHO LET THE DOGS OUT....WHO....WHO.....WHOWHO"
discipline over.
5:00 and every ten minutes after: "are we there yet?"
" I still don't know what a farm is"
"will there be cows on the farm?"
"Ava, we can ride cows!"
"when are we going swimming?"
" is that a farm over there?"
"can we stop and look at it?"
"mommy, Ava looked at me!"
"Carter punched me!"
"are we at he beach yet?"
"A FARM AND THE BEACH ARE TWO TOTALLY DIFFERENT THINGS, AND NO THERE WILL NOT BE A POOL THERE............YOU WILL LIVE!!!...IPROMISE! NO MORE QUESTIONS!"

12:30am:"this is it??? a farm?.......THE farm?" "are you SURE there isn't a pool?"

(I have officially decided to FLY home.......I just need to figure out how much it will cost to tow my car..........with my children strapped in it............gagged )